Breaking Open to Break Free
My dear friends,
We are all born with a unique purpose.
This purpose allows for us to share our gifts, talents, and light with the world and to do it with joy.
But so many of us get thrown into the storms of survival and practicality that we lose touch with ourselves and the hidden gems we were born to share.
I had a call with a trailblazing woman recently who, even after all of her amazing accomplishments, still feels like she hasn’t found what she was born to be doing in the world.
From the outside, she has it all: the beautiful home, family, and successful career.
But on the inside, she can feel that something is missing.
What is missing is her ability to access her real creativity and joy.
Everything she has built so far has been out of survival, checking boxes, and hitting milestones set by society.
None of it has actually been coming through a deep connection with herself and her joy.
It is not that her current life is wrong or bad in any way. It simply doesn’t capture the fullness of her radiance and all that she is and longs to be.
I know that many women share her struggle. They were taught to be “good,” to follow the rules, to be of service to everyone around them, and to climb the professional ladder and do it while also looking good, not stepping on toes, and smiling. They were programmed to see their worth in pleasing, performing, and achieving.
All the while, they were not given the space, opportunity, or guidance to connect with who they truly are and to uncover or perhaps remember the unique purpose they were born with: sharing the gems that are waiting to burst out of them and into the world.
There was a time when in some parts of the world, people would bury their daughters alive. I believe that society is still doing that, just in a different way. A way that keeps women alive enough to serve, but to never fully experience their own aliveness to thrive.
Our distance from our purpose often shows up in our bodies and lives as health conditions, recurring injuries, chronic pain, inflammation, hitting walls, repeating frustrating patterns, anxiety, and depression.
None of this is punishment, but rather life’s attempts to ready and redirect us to realign with our real purpose, joy, and thriving.
While they can help temporarily relieve the symptoms, the real answer isn’t found in medication, spa treatments, more self-care, or relaxing vacations.
The answer is sitting with the not knowing of who we truly are underneath all the roles society has us play.
The answer is in remembering our worth and that we are already enough, just as we are.
The answer is in freeing ourselves of our attachments to titles, jobs, positions, labels, and identities – they only limit what is possible to come through us.
The answer is in allowing ourselves to slow down and truly feel even the smallest joys and delights in our bodies (e.g. your child’s laughter, the first sip of your coffee, the feel of your favorite blouse on your skin) so that neurologically, our deepest joys and desires can slowly be accessed and emerge.
The answer is in coming together, holding each other, and letting ourselves play, explore, and discover the radiance that we were born to feel and share.
And underneath all of this, there is a deep collective grief and sadness for all the unlived lives and unfelt joys. We need to allow the grief to move through us so we can finally open ourselves to our aliveness and joy.
Grief is often the gateway to gold. So do not fear it if it comes up. Allow it to crack you open so that you can start to see all the beauty and power that is hidden inside.
May you find the courage to let yourself break open,
May you discover the gems that are meant to shine through you,
And may you truly thrive.
With love,
Maliheh